Total Turn Off.

I thought this was too funny not to share with everyone I know. ......

"Never let a man see you put on pantyhose."

I realize at first this sounds like one of those stupid sayings your aunt would have needlepointed on a throw pillow, next to others about golf and chocolate, but this is probably the most airtight advice I've ever been given. When you say it to men, they invariably say, "What? No way, that's hot," and then you remind them, no, it's hot when it's coming off, and even then, you're picturing it in the slow-motion burlesque tease that rarely accompanies actual sex. When you say this bit of advice to women, they go, "Ooh, yeah." No matter how skinny you are, no man need ever witness all the weird shimmies and jumps and kicks that go with getting nylons where you want them. It's like sausage being made.

And that my friends is why I dont wear pantyhose. EVER.